If you don’t know me very well, this may surprise you, but I am, by nature, pretty much a “loner.” I like solitude. Most of my preferred activities are actually the things I do by myself (ride a motorcycle, fly, target practice, read). But there are times when “another” is so important in my life that I almost cannot find words to express the angst felt when she is absent.

I have been married to Sue since 1974. We have been through a lot together. Great times, good times, mediocre times, sad times, grieving times, terrible times—and back to jubilant times. I was there with her, coaching her during the birth of each of our three beautiful little girls. And I was there by her side at the death of her father, and 30 years later, at the death of her mother. And she stood with me at the funeral and burial of my dad in November, 2010.

She is the most important person in my life. And by “person” I mean flesh-and-blood. So don’t think I put her before God.

It is when we are apart for longer periods that I seem to become most aware of just how much my life is intertwined with hers. Yes, I will confess it openly and boldly—I NEED her. And I really cannot imagine life without her. Last Wednesday Sue left with her youngest sister (and her husband) for a five day trip out to New York State to visit her youngest brother and his wife in their new home. Sue and her sister were really looking forward to being the first siblings to visit Jim and MaryAnne since they had moved from the Midwest to Southern New York State.

She left early in the morning last Wednesday. On that very afternoon our oldest daughter, Rachel, called me with some heart breaking and tragic news about a grievous loss in our family. Coming home to an empty house that evening was hard. And a week spent without Sue provided ample evidence that no matter how solitary I may be in nature, companionship feeds my soul in ways that “alone-ness” cannot.

And it reminded me graphically of what French philosopher, Paul Monet, once wrote… “A man alone is in bad company.”